Friday, January 31, 2020

My Friendship With Rhonda Reminds Me of a Friendship With a Pen-Pal That I Finally Meet Face to Face

My friendship with Rhonda reminds me of a friendship with a pen-pal that I finally get to meet face to face.  She has become one of my closest and dearest friends and what's amazing is we did not know one another face to face until just a few years ago.



Rhonda and I first met online in 2002 during the days of E-Groups/Yahoo Groups.  We were both members of a group associated with a religious organization I once worked for and where Rhonda and her husband worked at.  We had a mutual friend, Lisa Cohen, who told her about a book I wrote.  Rhonda read the book I wrote about my life, so Rhonda had the advantage of knowing something about me, but I knew little about her.

I wrote posts in that Yahoo Group and Rhonda would respond.  She seemed like a sensitive person, but that is all I really knew.

One of first really major connections occurred on September 16, 2005.  That was the day Rhonda's second child, a son, named Daniel was born.

September 16, 2005 was also the day that my husband, Dan, was in a horrible accident that changed my family's life forever.  Until then, my life and my children's lives were like Peter Pan: We seemed to jump from one adventure to another and thought only happy thoughts.  All that changed that day.

On that day, although Rhonda was giving birth, I asked people from all religions to pray for my husband and pray for me and my children.  She promised she would do that.

Dan miraculously lived and recovered.

As the years passed, Rhonda kept in touch with me online.  She had another child, a boy named Yossi, in 2010.  I was actively unschooling-homeschooling my three children and Rhonda was doing the same thing although her children are younger than mine.

In September of 2016, I heard from Rhonda while I was in southern California..  She reached out to me via Facebook Messenger and asked if perhaps I could meet her at her children's home school supplement that met in Long Beach while she was on a break from teaching.  She told me she had no "agenda" and was, at the time, on break from her work with the religious organization.  We exchanged some emails.  I decided I really wanted and needed to meet Rhonda face to face.

I told her I'd bring some scooters and hang out with her boys during their lunch break at the homeschool co-operative supplement.  Her oldest child, Gabriella, was at another homeschool program the day we met.





Getting together was so fun that I suggested we meet at a local ice rink and I would teach her children to skate.  Again, we had a great time together and I fell in love with her children too.



As time has passed, every time I am in Long Beach, I get together with Rhonda.  Sometimes we just take a walk or  hike together or sometimes we go out for a meal or coffee.  After skating once, I got to visit her house and meet her dog.  During my last trip to California, I finally got her to scooter with me!



Last year, one of the highlights of our friendship was attending her son Daniel's Bar Mitzvah which took place in the Gordon's backyard.  Daniel did a great job.  The connection I have with Daniel since he was born the same day of my husband Dan's accident came to me on that special day.  Her daughter Gabriella sang "Let Us Exalt His Name Together" which is one of my favorite songs.  It was very moving to hear that song at Daniel's Bar Mitzvah.  Our mutual friends, Lisa and Mike Cohen, were at the Bar Mitzvah.  Mike ran the service.  I also got to see Rhonda's friend Stephanie Silverman who I had met in Colorado Springs when Stephanie was visiting her sister Michelle.  (Rhonda really wanted me to meet her friend Stephanie and I can see why...Stephanie is so, so sweet!)



As my friendship with Rhonda grew, I eventually got to know Rhonda's husband, Cyril.  We met face to face for the first time at a Chinese restaurant.  The entire Gordon family came to that restaurant, but also our friend Dan and Lori Olds came.  I was totally amazed that night since way before I'd met Rhonda, I'd met Cyril via email back in 2002.  He, at the time, did not agree with some activity I was involved in.  What happened then is not necessary to explain on this blog, but what I dreamed for then was the reconciliation of certain people who had once worked for the religious organization both Cyril and Rhonda worked for.  For me, that night showed that some of my dream came true since I was eating and sharing company with Cyril and his family.  How totally wonderful is that?!!!!



(At another meal at the same Chinese restaurant Rhonda introduced me to her friend Marlayne Giron.)





Also, this past summer, I went to New Zealand for two weeks to see my daughter Rebekah who was performing with Disney On Ice in New Zealand.  I needed someone to keep an eye on my dad and take him out to eat.  Cyril made the commitment to be with my dad every day and Rhonda filled in when Cyril could not be there.  Just before I left I got to take their cute dog Charlie (sometimes called Mootles) for a scooter ride with me while Cyril took my dad to the Men's Club at Temple Israel.



Rhonda and her family have also gotten to know my husband Dan and my son Joel.  The entire Gordon family got to see Joel perform in Disney On Ice Frozen in Long Beach and Rhonda and her kids got to see Joel perform again in Disney On Ice Mickey's Search Party.





We share a love of healthy food (mostly vegan) so we met at Rhonda's favorite vegetarian Asian restaurant (Happy Veggie) and also at Veggie Grille and Mother's.  We've even shared Japanese Curry together which is my son Joel's favorite.


As time has passed, I've learned some very cool things about Rhonda.  She grew up in New York.  She holds a Master's Degree and is working on a PsyD and is a registered psychology assistant!  She is also a teacher. She also was an aerobics instructor.  She wrote for several newspapers and had articles published in several magazines including Old Schoolhouse Magazine and Practical Homeschooling.

She and Cyril met in Hawaii and only knew one another for only three weeks before they got married on January 16, 1999!  How romantic is that!!!?   Also, Cyril is both an Israeli and French citizen.



It's been only three and a half years since Rhonda reached out to me, but what has evolved is a friendship I cherish.  We can call one another anytime and confide in one another.  We care about each other like family.  We are so much alike and we are almost like sisters.  I know we will be lifelong friends.



FURTHER READING:

Posted by at No comments:

Saturday, October 20, 2018

RIP Ashleyann Carlson: July 1, 1955 -- September 30, 2018



Today, 10-20-18, I attended the memorial service for Ashleyann Carlson with my family's very special friend Tom McHugh. (I know Tom and his wife Lori from something that has nothing to do with skating.)

I met Ashleyann at the ice rink at Chapel Hills Mall in Colorado Springs somewhere in 2005 when she introduced herself and told me that she was friends with the McHughs and that Tom and her had once been ice dance partners. (Ashleyann was Tom's first ice dance partner in fact and Tom began ice skating at the age of 45!)

She adored Tom and Lori, so every time we saw one another, we'd talk the "wonderful McHughs!"

We've been in touch ever since 2005 and I always thought it was so wonderful that Ashleyann loved skating so much and that she was always so complimentary about my three children's skating accomplishments.

Ashleyann is missed so much. Hugs to her husband Ted and to everyone who loved Ashleyann.




This is the paper Ashleyann gave me in 2005 when I met her at the Ice Arena at Chapel Hills Mall in Colorado Springs.  I stuck it in my purse and forgot about it, but when I was cleaning an old purse out last weekend 10-13-18, I found this paper!

FURTHER READING:

Posted by at No comments:

Monday, August 6, 2018

I Am So Sad About Silvia Mehl's Tragic Death




I was so sad to learn last week that Silvia Correa Mehl was tragically killed on Tuesday morning 7/31/18 when she was hit by a semi dirt hauling truck while walking in her neighborhood in Trabuco Canyon, California.  Her husband Richard wrote that she was in the crosswalk, but the truck driver said he did not see her until after he ran her over.

Richard and Silvia Mehl had a huge impact on my life and have always held a special place in my heart.  When I first moved in with my Grandma Fannie in Long Beach, California, in 1978, Richard made me feel so welcome and he made it possible for me to indirectly meet my husband to be, Dan Farris.  He owned The Atherton House, and was one of our housemates during our early years of marriage.

I saw Richard and Silvia fall in love.

In those days, Richard shared his ups and downs with us, his housemates, and I remember the day he announced that he and Silvia were engaged!  (Richard's father died suddenly of a heart attack on July 4, 1979.  Richard was a "thinker" and I remember him saying that if his father was alive, he may have not been able to marry Silvia because she was of Mexican American descent.)

In those days, Silvia started and lived in a house called The Harvard House, a house that a bunch of girls shared.  The Atherton House and Harvard House were named after the streets they were on, Atherton and Harvard, and were like "brother and sister houses" but the Harvard House was a way less crazy place than the Atherton House.   My best friend and lifelong friend Marion lived at the Harvard House and my niece Timaree lived there for a short time too.

Silvia was sort of the leader of the Harvard House like Richard was the leader at The Atherton House.  In fact, Richard and Silvia were the center of what made both houses such unified and wonderful places.  They both were natural leaders that people gravitated towards.

One night I remember going to the movies with my husband and Richard and Silvia and how honored I felt that they took the time to be with us.

Richard was a planner.  He planned everything he did, and I even remember overhearing Richard and Silvia planning their lives together shortly after they got engaged!

I've been thinking that their retirement must have had been planned with wonderful things.  Silvia had just retired after 30 years of being a 2nd grade teacher and I know she must have been a wonderful teacher.  I'm sad that Richard and Silvia's retirement plans together will not happen.

I remember Richard and Silvia's wedding.  (Richard says that Silvia died just before their 37th anniversary.)  Their wedding was wonderful.  My Grandma Fannie enjoyed that wedding and whispered loudly to me as each of the bridesmaids came down the aisle and I remember how beautiful a bride Silvia was.  I cry at every wedding I go to, so of course I cried at Richard and Silvia's wedding.  And...I remember Richard and Silvia having a garage sale where they sold some of their wedding presents in front of the Atherton House!

Receiving holiday letters from Richard and Silvia was always a highlight.  They both always took the time to sign each holiday card with a personal message.

I remember when Richard and Silvia's children were young. We saw their children grow through those holiday letters.

At Silvia's baby shower, I remember there being other expectant mothers there who were close friends of Silvia's and I actually remember one of Silvia's friends (I think it was Lorelei, but it could have been Karen) mentioning that she had thought about that the children in their wombs might be present at their funerals.  I have thought about that statement in the past week, since yes, Silvia's daughter Naomi just sent out an announcement about her mother's memorial service which will be on August 18, 2018.  Yes...Naomi, the baby in Silvia's womb at that baby shower will be at her funeral...

I remember Silvia mentioning that every time she watched figure skating at the Olympics that she thought of me!  I can see her smile as she told me that.

Even though we did not see Richard and Silvia face to face during all these years, the two of them held a special place in our hearts and were a part of us.

Anyway, it's hard to picture Richard without Silvia and I'm so, so sad she is gone.

We have been in touch for about 40 years. My heart is breaking.

Richard and Silvia On Piano Bench Right Above Me At the Atherton House Reunion in 1982


 This is the intersection where Silvia was killed.  The truck driver was stopped at the stop sign and at the crosswalk and said he looked right but then waited for a white truck to make a left turn from the other crosswalk in front of him then another car that was in the other crosswalk went forward, and then the driver said he looked straight ahead and thought it was okay to go and didn't see Silvia in the crosswalk in front of him and drove right into her as he was making a left turn...the truck's trailer was low and crushed her.  She died on the scene.  It was about 8:05 am on Tuesday, July 31, 2018.

 A man came to the scene right away after hearing a scream and checked her pulse.  

 Richard had been searching for Silvia all morning and at 10:30 am he saw the police at the intersection where the accident occurred and tried to find out if the woman hit by the truck was Silvia.  He was not given any information, but later the coroner called Richard and confirmed that the accident's fatality was Silvia.   




FURTHER READING:

Posted by at No comments:

Sunday, August 5, 2018

My Friend Ellen Mentions That I Climbed Mt. Fuji!



My friend Dr. Ellen Albertson is a life coach specializing in women at mid-life.  In this video talk, she mentions that I climbed Mt. Fuji!

Actually, in one of her previous live video sessions, I mentioned I wanted to go to Japan and climb Mt. Fuji, and Dr. Ellen encouraged me to follow through on that idea and I did!

Ellen Albertson was live.
Midsummer: Celebrate Life & Cultivate Abundance
3 questions:
-What am I looking to cultivate inside of myself for the rest of this year?
-What am I looking to nurture and nourish in my relationships?
-What do I want to achieve with the work I am doing in the world?

FURTHER READING:

Posted by at No comments:

Thursday, March 8, 2018

Mary and Lyman Are "Like Family"

In January of 2014, my daughter Rebekah and my dad and I went to Chicago for an ice dancing partner tryout.  Rebekah tried out with Mary and Lyman's son Chris.  It turned out that Rebekah and Chris did not become skating partners, but a friendship that my family cherishes came out of our week together.

Lyman and Mary are the most generous,  fun, and wonderful people in the entire world!  When we are together we can laugh and talk and just "hang out" for hours and hours and even days and days.  When we are together we enjoy eating out and we enjoy taking walks together. I even got Mary and Lyman to buy kick scooters and go scootering with me!  I sort of taught Mary how to ride a scooter by the way...

And...Mary walked down all of Vail mountain while Lyman and I and our friend Joanna rode mountain scooters down the mountain.  (My husband Dan rode a bike down.)


JO ANN, Lyman, my friend Joann, and Mary - Vail. Colorado September, 2016

Rebekah and Chris - January, 2014

Mary, my husband Dan, and Lyman - Vail, Colorado September, 2016


Mary and Lyman own the coolest blue colored Victorian house that is covered with ivy in Chicago.  They moved there for graduate school and just stayed.  Inside the house is the coolest upright grand piano which Lyman plays daily.  He is passionate about playing piano.

Mary went to law school, but never really had a chance to practice law since Mary took care of her ailing mother for quite some time.  They now travel to their vacation home in Florida which they inherited after Mary's mother passed away.  (I was so worried about Lyman and Mary's safety since they were in Florida around the time of that horrible Hurricane Irma in the fall of 2017.  Fortunately, they just drove out of the state and enjoyed some site-seeing instead.  They didn't want to leave their car in Florida during the hurricane.)

Lyman and Mary both like to drive and drive around the crowded Chicago highways all the time.  They got used to driving a lot when their son Chris trained at his skating in the Chicago metro area.  I am always amazed how calmly they drive through all the Chicago traffic!

My dad and Lyman - January 2014


When my family had a personal emergency, Lyman and Mary came to the rescue.  They even drove my dad's car out from Chicago to Colorado after my dad moved away from Chicago.   Then, they stayed with us for over two weeks in Colorado and during those two and a half weeks we had so much fun that we all felt like we were on a never-ending vacation.  We even spent a day at the lake kayaking together.  Mary loved kayaking in our inflatable two person kayak with her husband.

When we visited Chicago, Lyman and Mary took us on one adventure after another.  We visited the museum of Science and Industry, the Chicago Art Museum, and the Chicago Botanical Gardens.   I got Lyman to ice skate with me a few times and taught him how to do a beginning ice dance and some figures.  Lyman even ended up getting his photo included in my book, MY SKATING LIFE.

JO ANN and Lyman - January 2014


When the Disney On Ice Frozen tour came to Chicago, Lyman and Mary, picked Joel up at his hotel and showed him around and treated him just like he was their own son.  They also came to the show and watched Joel perform.  That was during Joel's first season of traveling with Disney On Ice and Mary and Lyman gave Joel a feeling that he had "family" in Chicago.

Mary took care of my daughter Rebekah after Rebekah had surgery.  Mary also fell in love with the cat Rebekah had then and our dog Duchess became very attached to Mary.

Lyman and my dad can talk for hours and hours about medicine.  Lyman tells me he always wanted to be a pathologist like my dad, but he is now a retired pharmacologist.  He helped in the development of a drug called lansoprazole.   My husband and Lyman can talk about religion and politics for hours.  Joel also enjoys talking politics with Lyman. 

Lyman has the best laugh in the world.   His laugh is so wonderful that just hearing him laugh makes other people happy. 

Mary and Lyman's son Chris is the love of their life just like my three children are the loves of my life.  Chris visits his parents in the USA when he can, but he is in Bulgaria and England and Chris is an elite ice dancer.

Yes, Mary and Lyman are the best friends in the world and  really are "like family."  I wish we could be together more often, but we know that if we need anything at all, they would be there for us.  How totally cool is that?!  And...our wonderful friendship began because of figure skating, but so much more than skating now connects us for life!




FURTHER READING:

Posted by at No comments:

Thursday, March 1, 2018

Only My Hairdresser Gail "Knows For Sure"


 "Does She Or Doesn't She? Only her hairdresser knows for sure." 

The above slogan went with a late 1950s early 1960s and 1970s television commercial for a hair coloring product called "Miss Clairol."

That slogan is also completely true when it comes to the only stylist who has ever "touched my hair" since November of 1991!  That person is Gail - my hairdresser.  Although I am Gail's client, we are friends.  Not only that, we know so much about one another!

Think about it this way:  If a woman like myself goes to the same hairstylist for appointments every six to seven weeks for over 27 years, it makes complete sense that the person who does my hair would know a lot about me and I'd know a lot about her!  It also makes perfect sense that we would become friends.


Here's the story of the very special bond-friendship I have with Gail:


In early November of 1991, right after my husband Dan and I moved to Colorado Springs from San Francisco, I did the usual things that one does after a move.  I filled out change of address forms.  I got a Colorado Driver's license and I registered to vote in Colorado.  I found a dentist.  I found a doctor.  I landed a job.  And....of course, I found the most important person a woman needs...I found a hairdresser!

JO ANN and Dan - So Happy To Have Moved to Colorado in Late 1991 

I was in my early 30s then and "the grey" was beginning to show slightly in my dark brown hair.  When I lived in San Francisco, I'd begun to have my hair colored to cover that little bit of grey every six weeks or so.  I knew I most definitely wanted to continue getting my hair colored to cover the grey after I moved to Colorado, so I called my former skating partner's wife Debbie, and asked where she had her hair done.

Debbie told me she went to a place called Hombre Hair Designers and had her hair done by someone named Annie, so I called that salon and asked for Annie.  Annie told me she didn't "do color," but told me that Gail, who also worked at her salon, did "do color," so I set up an appointment with Gail.

I remember the day I had my first appointment with Gail in late November, 1991.  I guess when new clients set up appointments at hair salons, they don't always show up, so when I entered the Hombre salon, just as I walked in, I heard Gail saying to another stylist, "I wonder if my new client named Jo Ann will show up?"  And....there I was!  (Guess what?  I've "showed up" ever since...)

Hombre was located in beautiful area at the foot of Cheyenne Mountain.  It was the coolest salon since every stylist had their own private area that was really a private room-like cubicle.  I loved it since my hair was cut and colored in total privacy. (No one, except Gail, could see what I looked like when coloring goop was on my head...)

I have had hair appointments with Gail every six to seven weeks since that very first appointment with Gail that took place in November of 1991!  I even arrange my travel plans around my hair appointments with Gail.

Gail did my hair when I was pregnant with all three of my children, but was also "there" when I miscarried during my first pregnancy.  She did my hair when she was pregnant.  She even gave my son Joel his first haircut!  She has cut (and briefly colored) my husband Dan's hair and she has cut both of my daughters' hair.  I'm fairly certain she gave my daughter Rebekah her first first haircut. (Rebekah and I remember that poor Gail had to get a lot of tangles out of Rebekah's hair since Rebekah never let anyone comb her hair when she was a little kid.)  Gail has even cut, styled, or colored some of my friends' hair.

My Son Joel's First Haircut by Gail at Hombre Hair Design

We have taken part in one another's life journeys during every one of my hair appointments since Gail and I have told one another so much about what is going on in our personal lives.  Gail tells me that I always have stories to tell her that make her laugh, but we have also cried together.  I have also learned about how she grew up in a small southern Colorado town and how she ended up moving to Colorado Springs.

When my children were little, I would sometimes take all three of them to my hair appointments.  At Salon Frank Paul, I recall there was an area where they could sit "quietly" and color and play.  At Jerome de Fazio, I have a recollection that Gail had to call me to tell me that children were not allowed, so my husband Dan took off work to watch the kids during my hair appointments with Gail from that point on.

Our little Pomeranian dog, Porcher, died in early 2012.  I remember it was a Thursday, and I had a hair appointment with Gail that day.  I went to the appointment while Dan and the kids made funeral arrangements for our dog and I remember Gail giving me advice on how to bury a dog properly!  (We were very sad, but we couldn't help but giggle when Dan called and asked how to wrap the dog in the box we prepared to put in the ground.)  When I got home, after the hair appointment, I had "perfect hair" during our sweet dog's funeral.

When my husband Dan was in a horrible accident in 2005, Gail even came to the hospital to give him a haircut and beard trim after he came out of being in a coma.  (Dan says he looked like a motorcycle gang member before that haircut and beard trim.  I thought he kind of looked like an old mountain man.)

Dan and Rebekah and Joel Before Gail Cut His Hair - October 2005

Dan and all of us after Gail cut his hair at the hospital - October 2005

It has not even crossed my mind not to follow Gail from one salon location to another salon location since she is one of the best hair stylists ever.

(Gail and my daughters laugh that I've had the same exact hair color and cut for all these years!  Although my hair color and cut may have not changed much, Gail has had many different colors of hair and styles through the years...)

Salon Frank Paul
Retouch Salon - Old Colorado City

From the Hombre salon in Cheyenne Mountain, she moved to Salon Frank Paul, a salon on South Tejon Street that was fairly near Hombre.  Then she moved to this very fancy and plush salon in the upper Skyway area of Colorado Springs on 21st street called Jerome de Fazio.  From there, she moved to a salon inside an old church in Old Colorado City called Perfect Angels.  (Can you imagine?  A salon inside a church?!)  And then there was Caposhi salon, also in Old Colorado City.  After the Caposhi salon flooded, I followed Gail to her current location, Retouch Salon, also on Colorado Avenue in Old Colorado City.

I went to Gail's house, instead of a salon, for at least a couple of hair appointments in these past 27 years: Once after her daughter was born and once after the Caposhi salon flooded.

I literally have gone where Gail has gone!  Since that first appointment with Gail in 1991, I've just followed her around!

And...during all these years together the two of us have gone from us both having no children to having kids.  Many birthdays have passed and been celebrated and we've watched one another's kids grow up and we've talked about our husbands, Dan and Tim, and we talk about our families.  We've shared lots of laughs and we shared lots of tears, and have shared a few secrets.

Gail was around when I lost my first baby to miscarriage.  I was around when she had her daughter Emilia Rose.  We've given one another advice.  I've met some of Gail's friends and family members.  I met her fellow stylist from Salon Frank Paul, also named Gail, who died tragically.  We've been there for one another when we've lost people who we've cared about and loved.  Gail even told me about the greatest handyman ever, Janus Zalewski, who has a lot of work inside and outside of our house.  (Janus is awesome too!)

Gail's Friend Janus has done so much work on our Blue House in Colorado!


Gail's Daughter Emilia Rose 2018

Gail's Niece Heather and JO ANN - Sun Valley, Idaho Summer of 2017
Gail's Niece Heather, Jo Ann, and Gail's Grand-Niece Morgan - Sun Valley, Idaho 2017

Of course, Gail has a signed copy of my autobiography, My Skating Life.  Also, Gail has a grand-niece who is a figure skater!  I'd heard about her niece and grand-niece for years (ever since my kids went to Salt Lake City for US Figure Skating's Junior Nationals in 2007) and I've been in touch with her niece on Facebook, but finally, during the summer of 2017, I met Gail's niece Heather when I was in Sun Valley, Idaho with my dad and my daughters.  Gail's niece Heather approached me as I was riding my Razor scooter by the outdoor Sun Valley rink and told me she was Gail's niece. I was so delighted!  It was great to finally meet Heather and Morgan face to face.

Rebekah's Bat Mitzvah in 2011 - Gail and Emilia are sitting in the 4th row

Gail and her daughter Emilia attended my daughter Rebekah's Bat Mitzvah and I am fairly certain Gail styled and trimmed Rebekah's hair before that special day.  Gail made Rebekah's hair look really fantastic before an audition and every once in awhile Gail trims my daughter Annabelle's beautiful long hair.  Sometimes my dad will just "hang out" at the salon when I get my hair done.

My daughter Annabelle smiles after Gail trimmed her hair in January of 2018
na



My Daughter Rebekah Smiles After Gail Did Her Hair Before an Audition in 2014

Gail rejoiced with me when my son Joel was hired for Disney On Ice.  I recall that she may have been the first person I told the news since Joel received an email offering him a part in the cast of Disney On Ice Frozen just before one of my hair appointments.

After 27 years, Gail and I know we have a very special and unique friendship and connection.  Our friendship and bond has grown way beyond a client-merchant relationship and we've grown closer and closer.  What we have has become more and more special.

Yes!  It is true.  Only my hairdresser Gail "knows for sure!"




FURTHER READING:

Posted by at No comments:
Subscribe to: Posts (Atom)